~By Dilip Bobb
George Orwell’s Nineteen Eighty Four was a dystopian novel set in a Superstate which maintained omnipresent control over the lives of its citizens. Independent thinking was a thought crime enforced by the thought police. Big Brother, the leader, enjoyed an intense cult of personality. Fast forward to India in 2050 and things will be very different, even utopian, as experts in the Ministry of Truth predict. Here’s our fictional future
Salute to Democracy: Morning ritual made compulsory for all citizens in 2020. It starts with everyone gathering in public spaces at 6 am (those who fail to attend are declared non-citizens and enemies of the state) and singing Vande Mataram. This is followed by a yoga session digitally orchestrated by Baba Ramdev in Rishikesh and Sri Sri Ravi Shankar on the banks of the Yamuna. The session ends with all standing for the national anthem and saluting the national flag. Those sitting for their morning ritual will be penalised.
Food Fast: The opposite of fast food, food fast was introduced by Ram Vilas Paswan, the erstwhile minister for consumer affairs. His proposal that people should fast while eating was based on his theory that five-star restaurants were serving customers more than they could eat and portions should be cut to avoid waste. A formula, called the Quantum Theory, was applied to determine suitable portions. Those used to a breakfast of four idlis are now restricted to two and a plate of butter chicken comes without the chicken. The public initially found this hard to swallow but realised it was a waste of effort after it was forced down their throat.
Cowboys and Indians: This programme is purely voluntary but everyone is expected to attend. Overseen by the Ministry of Cows, an upgrade on the model ministry introduced in Rajasthan, it teaches the benefits of preserving the cow. A lecture on the subject is broadcast daily, recited by erstwhile Gujarat Chief Minister Vijay Rupani which contains variations on his oft-repeated theme that cow protection saves the world from moral and social degradation. All Indians are taught by cowboys, or Gau Rakshaks, from UP and Rajasthan on how to avoid cow slaughter, using the Alwar case as an example.
Family Plan: Based on the “Hum Do, Hamare Do” model introduced by Sanjay Gandhi and later modified by the Assam government, it proposes that families with more than two children will be barred from government jobs. The Ministry of Home Affairs has expanded on that by saying families with more than two children will not be eligible for any government benefits or welfare schemes, including the promised deposits in Jan Dhan accounts. The Assam model was based on the premise that there was a population explosion among certain sections of society and, like what happened under Sanjay Gandhi, drastic cuts were required.
Clash of Dates: It’s becoming a fad to celebrate a cause or event and name a day after it. In India, however, the government’s choice of Remembrance Days has acquired an ominous and discriminatory ring. Christmas Day has been chosen as Good Governance Day, and, more recently, Good Friday has been anointed as Digital India Day. Christians have not smelled a conspiracy theory since the Last Supper but are now starting to develop a persecution complex.
Battle of the Bottle: Big Brother started the experiment in Gujarat and it spread across the country as the Supreme Court and BJP chief ministers battled the bottle. The former advised drivers not to take the “high” way while the latter, desperate to please Big Brother, are threatening a booze ban in their respective states, after bans on beef, romance and anything remotely erotic. Orwell’s Superstate was overtaken by Singapore as a Nanny State; now India has lurched a step further, becoming the Banny State.
The 2020 Scenario: Once the BJP has a majority in the Rajya Sabha, we have been promised a New India. Constitutional amendments can make it possible to have a Prime Minister for Life since he is larger than life, to ensure every citizen votes for the BJP thanks to future EVMs, and so that India’s glorious history starts from May 2014. Paradise Gained!